If you haven’t noticed already, I’m definitely one of life’s fast people. I move at the speed of light and I think just as fast. It can be hard for people to keep up with me. ‘Down time is prime time!’ is one of my secret mottos. I might look like I’m resting, but it’s likely that my mind is busy processing even while I’m stopping to breathe and I’m definitely not reading that book to unlock a ‘story’. I’m mining for insight. Almost every minute of every day.
It’s a fun way to live and of course, it has its many drawbacks.
Sometimes it’s hard to keep up with myself.
One of the beautiful things about being in partnership with a modern day monk, is that often she leans over and pulls the handbrake on while I’m in full flow. Her timing is almost always impeccable, even though I’m not always thrilled in the moment.
You see, I know it’s critical for me to develop my ability to be here, right now. Instead of in my favourite place, the future, where I have created amazing things.
I know that it’s here, in the present moment, where all of the magic is. All of the possibility. All of the joy, the grace, the love. It can’t possibly be in the present, which doesn’t even exist yet. It can only be here. Even in this moment, where my fingers are tapping on a keyboard with barely any conscious instruction, there is an opportunity for joy.
As I cultivate the skill of being here more and more, I’m grateful for my real human handbrake. For having created a life in which I have surrounded myself with wisdom that will stop me long before I am about to fall.
I’m also a woman with strong boundaries. I know how to say no to that which doesn’t interest me and it’s rare (although it absolutely happens) that I’ll do something for you when I don’t want to do it for me. To be clear, I regularly DO want to do something for you, that’s what I’m all about, but I know to trust the warning signs in my head that tell me if I show up without full commitment, you won’t receive what you need anyway, best to say no.
Just recently, I got to wondering if all that busy and all that clarity didn’t have me missing out on things in this exact moment.
(What’s so funny is that even as I’m typing this, I’m so present that I have completely fallen in love with the very act of watching my fingers on the keyboard!). I got to wondering if there were opportunities for sheer joy and wonder being presented to me in every single moment that I was simply walking, texting, or typing by.
And so I have begun an experiment.
One that has me focus my attention on what is occurring right here and now.
One that has me reflect in the moment, once I have noticed what is happening, ‘now that I have seen this, what shall I do about it?’.
One that has me take action from there.
It’s a theory that says ‘whatever happens is the right thing, whoever shows up to me is the right person and all I have to do is notice and respond’.
Turns out it’s a magic theory. I had a hunch it might.
Each time I remember to practice this theory, I notice the tiny things that I might have walked by before.
– The message from a stranger that seems to indicate she is struggling. Where before I would have sent a nice but meaningless response, this time, I sit with what I could really offer her that might be of insight. She writes back, ‘Wow. How can a stranger help me so much in a single message? I’m crying’.
– The call with another that I have offered to do, but now don’t want to. Even last week, I might have rearranged to a day where I have more energy. Today, I make the decision to show up fully. We chat easily on the screen. I see the place where I might really be able to help and offer my thoughts. ‘Wow. THIS I can do!’ they respond and off they go. A single conversation complete.
– The guy who serves our coffee in the morning, getting the chance to share that he is a masters graduate who is now learning coding. Delighting in the fact that he is getting to talk about something more than the nuances of our two lattes, which is all we have ever discussed on our daily visits for more than five months now.
– The moment I realise my husband is distracted by something else and doesn’t really want to listen to my excitement right now and I back off to let him finish what he’s doing. Combined by the moment the following day when he does the same for me. A new and easy shift in how we show up for each other in a marriage that is 16 years old and you would think we had done it all.
– The day I realise that THIS could be the best day of my life and set about living as though it is in a day that’s full of regular conversations. The day that turns out to be so full of opportunity I can barely breath with the possibility.
– The next day when I wake up as though it’s Christmas Day even though it’s’ just a rainy October Thursday and realise that THIS could be the best day of my life too.
And suddenly I see. I am creating all of this.
In my willingness to be present to what’s needed now. In my curiosity about how it could even be possible to create the best day of my life in this strange year that none of us could ever have imagined.
Laughing when I realise that nothing has changed at all.
Except that I’m here. In this exact moment. At 12.28 on a Monday afternoon.
And that here, this exact moment, is where the magic was all along.
Right in front of me all the time. Not going anywhere at all.
It had never left me at all. I kept leaving it. In my rush to head to the future.
Of course.
Come, be present here with me, whatever time and day you are reading for this.
And look out for the magic. It’s right here in front of you.
It’s right in front of you
